This is from my upcoming book, Natural Way of Being: When we offer our intention to initiate the dance of unfoldment, it is essential to detach from the outcome. We live in a results-based culture and obviously getting results has it place. Your boss or team leader wants results, right? But with the dance of unfoldment, we are interacting with many things beyond our control. And
when allowing things to unfold, we are not going to try to control or force things to happen outside of ourselves to get specific outcomes.
An example includes helping a friend or family member that you are concerned about. You offer your intention in the form of a suggestion or invitation to help, then you let go of what they do with it. You say your piece and then let it go. They can do whatever they choose with it. At this point you are complete- you did what you were called to do.
Instead of forcing outcomes, we are going to learn from the outcomes that unfold. We might say, "Wow I did not see that one coming," and then change our approach. Our next intention adjusts based on what we learned from the previous outcomes. Remember that unfoldment is an exploration. We are relying on trial and error to learn what works and what does not.
While you may learn from the outcome, do not evaluate yourself on the basis of outcome. Rather, you are going to find excellence on basis of intention and action. Ask yourself, “Was my intention clear?” Or, “Was there anything else I could have done to create connection in that experience?" Or perhaps, "Did I give it my all?" If your intention and action are clear, the outcomes will take care of themselves.
About the Author
I, Michael Hoffman, am a licensed psychotherapist, teacher, and author with 25 years experience in counseling and teaching experiential workshops. I have maintained this blog since 2009, and my second book Natural Way of Being will published in 2019.
I offer in-person and video-conferencing counseling, intensive workshops, and online courses to allow participants to directly experience their natural way of being and the life they would have for themselves.