Video Summary:

I've been working with finding the flow of my life in my personal spiritual practice. I work part-time at the emergency room in Bend, and as it turns out, working in the emergency room can be a really good indicator and teacher if I'm in my flow or not.

Yesterday I asked a nurse for a hand with a patient, and she simply looked at me and she just said, “No”. I was a little surprised and taken aback, but I just kept moving and found someone else to help me. Later, as I did some inquiry around this, I realized that I did become attached to her helping me.

I also realized when I'm in my flow and then attach to a person, situation, or outcome, it takes me out of my flow. As I worked with this, I identified a few key words that guide me to stay in my flow.

The first is to see situations and people as possibilities. I like the word possibility because it's not expecting or assuming whether the person is going to help me or that the outcome is going to go my way. It's just a possibility that she's part of my flow or that this approach will work, so there's less attachment.

And the second word I really like is invitation. After I see the possibility, I invite the person to be part of my flow. I find that if I'm really in my flow and on my game, I'm equally able to accept a yes or no answer from a person, or whether something works or not.

Of course, it always feels better if we try something and it works, or if we ask for help and they say yes. But if I hold it as pure possibility and pure invitation, I can flow with it either way- whether the answer is yes or no, or if the outcome works or doesn't work.

If it doesn’t work or someone says no, I can say to myself, “I guess my flow is in another direction instead.” It becomes part of the mystery of how the flow of my life will unfold.

The obvious metaphor is flowing like water. Water in a stream flows around the rocks. It doesn't get attached and continue to slam into the same boulder, expecting the boulder to change. The boulder or obstacle is showing the water where to flow and in that way becomes part of the flow.