Video Summary:

We're conditioned to view the most important parts of ourselves from outside of ourselves. We look to other people, experiences, and our culture. We look to whether we fit in or not and if people are happy with us. And we look to whether we’re successful or not according to the terms of our culture. And we evaluate ourselves that way.

And by the most important parts of ourselves, I mean the beauty and true value of our being, our worthiness. Are we enough, or do we see ourselves as if there is something wrong with us? So we're in this habit of looking outside of ourselves.

And of course, the problem with this is that other people are not able to see us clearly. They don't know what we are like inside. They don't know what life feels like to us and who we are. They see us through their eyes and so their view of us is about them and not about us.

And, we look to our culture to determine if we are successful, if we fit in, and if we are living the American dream. And these things are not accurate or clear indicators. They're not a true assessment of our beauty, worth, and value.

If we can't get it from outside ourselves, how do we get it? Of course, the answer is we have to look inside. What that really means is we have to get a sense of it and feel it. It’s an intuitive feeling, a subjective feeling.

Value-laden assessments such as worth, value, beauty, and sufficiency (like am I enough?) are subjective. They have to come from an experience, from inside ourselves. It's a subjective feeling that we have.

Some spiritual practices are intended for this such as meditation and the self-inquiry practice of asking yourself a question, waiting for the answer to come, and feeling that the answer is true.

And once you experience this subjective feeling that feels true, you need to trust it. It’s allowing yourself to look to yourself and your gut feelings to experience the truth of your being.

So if you have a conflict in your life, go inside, go to the well, go to the source. Perhaps you’re wondering, “Am I doing enough as a parent?” Or, “Was I uncool with my friend?” Go inside and find the answer. Sit with it until you feel it to be true.