The Abundance that is here.
May 15, 2024Video Summary:
I recently got a hotel on the beach in Crescent City with a balcony looking out over the ocean. I poured a glass of wine and said myself “Life is good.” Until… I got on my laptop and noticed the internet was not working. After calling the front desk it became evident that the internet was just not going to work.
I felt disappointed because apparently, I had some expectations for my evening. While sitting on the balcony overlooking the ocean, I was going to get online send some playful messages to people on a dating site, and then watch a movie after it got dark. And so I was left with, “Damn, I don't have internet.”
So I had to accept that it was not going to happen and let go of the picture. I got a good laugh at myself. Here I am overlooking the ocean. It's a beautiful night. I have my glass of wine. And I'm pissed because the internet doesn't work. But it was a thing because I had to let go of my preconceived plans.
Then a thought came to me, “So what is here? What abundance is presenting itself to me right now?” After all, most of the elements of my preconception were still there- it just wasn’t the complete picture. Sure it's easier to see what’s there when you're on the beach, and more challenging in other situations.
So this became a theme of my trip because it was one of those weekends that the sun would come out and then it would rain. And the different accommodations had different strengths and weaknesses. I got into this practice of: “What is here? Accept what's not here. So how can I enjoy what is here?
My experience and truth tell me that there's usually some abundance of some sort that is trying to come to us. It may not be what we pictured, but it's there.
The first step is accepting that the thing you wanted to be there or were expecting to be there is not there- at least in the way you thought it would be. Things come to us differently than we think. Then it’s allowing yourself to feel the disappointment, anger, or sadness that arises but not attaching to it. And moving on.
The second step is asking yourself, “Okay, so what is here? What is presenting itself to me? What opportunities, abundance, and beauty are here?
I've found that I have to literally look around because if I’m expecting one thing, I don't see the other things that are there. We tend to target lock on the thing we wanted to be there and so that's all we see. We have to shake it out, look around the environment we're in, and see what’s there.
And what is there may not be something we're used to. This is a great opportunity to experience new things. It can be the thing that gets us out of a rut. We’re simply exploring the thing that is there and seeing how it works. It's how we stumble upon some really cool things.
I use another application of this in sessions to go beyond relationship or behavioral patterns. I offer a hypothetical situation, “Envision yourself at a party with every type of person for a romantic relationship or friendship. The first thing we usually see is the type of person that we have a relationship pattern with.
You can say, “Okay, there he is. That's the person that I would typically go for." Then it's saying, “Okay, I know he’s there, and I can come back to him, but who else is here?" Then it's literally looking around the room to see who else is there.
Seeing someone new you might say, “Hmm, I've never really gone out with anyone like him before, but he seems interesting. Maybe you go talk to him knowing you can always go back and talk to the person you’re used to talking to.
This often requires getting out of your comfort zone and saying hi to a different type of person. Or it might be figuring out how something works that you haven't done before. It may take some energy and courage to cross over your resistance to these things, but it's often well worth it.