Video Blog Transcription:

(00:00):

Welcome to the Natural Way of Being Video Blog. This video is titled “X-Factor”. The Grateful Dead when describing some of their shows would talk about this thing called an X-factor.

They talked about it being this kind of intangible element that would happen at some of their shows that would take a normal performance and take it to a higher level. They talked about happening when the band became one with the audience and got in the same state of mind or consciousness.

And yes, I personally did experience the Grateful Dead X-factor, and I also experienced it without drugs, just to note that.

(00:56):
So I also noticed that this would happen when I was working with my teacher back 35 years ago and ever since. We would do these ceremonies or workshops or even individual sessions, and sometimes there would be this magic or X-factor, and other times there were not. And I also recognized it when I'd go to Adyashanti retreats.

And when I started teaching and doing individual sessions, workshops, retreats, and ceremonies, I noticed that sometimes it would be there, and sometimes it would not.

And there's a real tendency to really attach because when it happens, it's this really expansive, meaningful experience that everyone would say, “Wow, that was so cool.” And, so then there's also a real tendency to think when it's not there that something's off. Do you know?

(02:03):
And so I really started becoming conscious of this, last December when I started doing sharing circles. And because it started happening more in some circles would have this really cool X-factor or magic if you will. And it would just be amazing, and everyone would say, “That was such a cool circle.” And then others (circles), were really cool and we got some great work done, but it didn't have that expansive feeling that went with it, that X-factor.

And so, me being kind of the perfectionist that I am, I figured, “Well, I've got to figure out like how to nail these sharing circles so there's X-factor every time. They're paying me for these experiences, and I really want them to have this amazing experience every time.”

(02:57):
And of course, what I found was that I couldn't make it happen no matter what I did. I would like do ceremony before and get all ready and do all these different things. It just seemed to be that sometimes it happened and sometimes it didn't.

Then I thought back with my teacher and sometimes it was there and sometimes it wasn't, and he was like this enlightened guy. And then I'd go to Adyashanti retreats, and again sometimes it was there, and sometimes it wasn't.

Even with the Grateful Dead, it wasn't always there. That's why it came to be known, because sometimes it was there and sometimes it wasn't. There were these great shows and then other shows were really good, but...

(03:50):
And so I just came to realize is that we can create the conditions for the magic or the X-factor, but we really can't make it happen. It kind of happens when it happens. It's almost like this grace that happens from the other side, from Spirit or some X-factor, which has means we can't describe it. The conditions just line up just right and become synchronistic in a way that this magic just seems to happen.

So once you've experienced the X-factor or magic, and I'm assuming that all of you have experienced it in one form or another- either at a concert, out in nature, during a meditation, or during a workshop or a ceremony. And it just feels like this expansive space. Once you've experienced it, there's this tendency to undervalue experiences when you don't experience it.

If you experience it during meditation, and then you have a meditation that it isn't there, you think, “Oh, I must not have been meditating right, because I didn't feel the magic.” And I think this is not necessarily so, but there's this natural thing that we want to experience it every time.

(05:03):
And so I realized this one time when I did a session with the client and there was very definitely not the X-factor at this session. In fact, I got a real strong sense that the client was not real happy with me. I had pointed out some things, that perhaps he didn't want to see, that he didn't want to look at.

So I just kind of thought the session was a dud, and I felt kind of bad. I'm was thinking, “Sorry, man, I did the best I could. I kind of went with what came to me.” And, then I just kind of let it go. I didn't give him his money back or anything, but I just figured, “Well, that wasn't one of my best efforts.”

(05:46):
And sure enough, the next time that we met, he said, “Oh my gosh, two or three days after we had that session, I realized what we were talking about during the session. And I saw it, and I saw like how I did that. And I had this huge epiphany and this transformation. That was one of the best sessions that we ever did.”

And I thought, “Hmm, okay, No X-Factor and really good session. Well, that's interesting.” And then I thought back at some of the other powerful sessions and beautiful sessions I did. I'm evaluating them based on the clients saying that they were really transformative in some way.

And, you know, some of them had X-factor or magic and some of them didn't. So the actual benefit or value of the session seemed to be somewhat independent of whether there was magic or X factor there.

(06:54):
And so, so my suggestion and kind of the takeaway from all this is, don't undervalue an experience because there wasn't magic, there wasn't bells and whistles, and there wasn't the X factor or this really expansive, wonderful feeling. Sometimes, the most normal or even, I dare say, boring experiences can be really valuable.

About a month ago, I was at an Adyashanti gathering and there were other Adyashanti students there. And one of the students said, “Don't even bother watching the last video of the talk he (Adyashanti) did, it's not very good. And I translated that there wasn't X-factor, and that’s why it wasn't good. And so I figured, “Well, the hell with it, I'm watching this video.” And it was amazing.

(07:53):
And I look back and thought, how arrogant that his students are evaluating that this was a good talk, and this wasn’t. And it took me back to the Grateful Dead days saying, “This show was amazing, and this show was all right.

It's a little arrogant to evaluate our teacher’s teachings based on whether we thought they were awesome or not. I'm just saying. But that's what the mind does, right? If it has an expansive experience it attaches to it. If it doesn't, it tends to undervalue it or discount it.

(08:33):
So in closing, my suggestion is to enjoy the magic, X-factor, or peak experiences they've also been called. Enjoy the expansive amazingness of these experiences. Enjoy them when they come, but please don't undervalue or discount experiences where it's not present. Because some of those ordinary, or even boring, experiences may be the perfect experience that you need to experience at that time. So enjoy them too.

And so that's my video blog for this week. Thank you for watching. I wish you a week where you enjoy all the experiences from the most magical to the most boring, and everything in between, and I'll see you in a week.